Saturday, 23 March 2019

Terrible week

This week started off quite well as far as I was concerned, then on Tuesday I had two researchers at home supposedly asking about Lewy Body Dementia, but by the time they left I was shattered and felt rubbish all week.

I spent so much time trying to concentrate on “Just another question” that I guess I tried to force myself to get through without making mistakes  

My wife told me yesterday that I had changed, because of the way it was handled, and the constant questions, which were far worse than the normal memory questions.  I don't think I have ever seen so many questions like that. 

In dementia we get used to the memory tests, but to me this went far beyond anything I have ever had to do, and it destroyed the rest of my week, and I was not pleasant to be around,  so I am told 

This hurt when I was told it, after which I said I would never do anything like that ever again.

It’s so sad, because without research we will not get the answers to these illnesses, but sadly it has finished me. 

Researchers need to be caring and understanding, when looking at this subject, but I felt that the person doing the research with me was out of her depth, because she knew nothing about the well known people with dementia, and don’t think she knew much about Lewy Body Dementia. 

I confess that by the time I had finished this project I felt like throwing my medication away, and saying to hell with it. 

But I guess looking back I may well be wrong and need to think again. 

I have done reaserch at Newcastle University, which was tiring, but handled sensitively and that makes a vast difference

In the future I will work with them but no one else.

I had said prior to the research, that I did not wish to take part in the usual question paper looking into depression, something that many of these researchers think we all have

Yet something seemed to stick in my memory, and I am convinced that I still did those questions when I was totally shattered 

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