Sunday 3 April 2016

Bad nights return again

Last year my  nightly nightmares seemed to ease off, and I thought wrongly that I was at the end of this episode, but I was wrong.

Over the last 4 weeks they have returned with a vengeance, but I simply do not understand why this has happened, because as far as life is concerned there have been very little changes if any.

Some of these things bare no resemblance to real life at all, but no matter how you look at them, you are a major part of these things.

I guess that is why so many things have been sent flying during the night when I lashed out, that includes bedside lights which ended up being shattered, because they were sent flying across the bedroom

They are so graphic that it is hard to understand where they stop and reality kicks in.
I suppose the problem is that being part of this horror, you are actually acting it out in more ways than enough, and this makes it difficult to cope with.

I have often woken up from one of these, and then I have then sat in the bathroom or have gone downstairs for a while. 
Sometimes I am lucky and that's the end of them, on other occasions however, they seem to start off where they stopped and that is very distressing.

On one horrible night, these things seemed to go in for ever, but I have no real idea how long they lasted. 

But during this night, I thought that I had woken up three times, and had then gone to the toilet and then sat in our front room. 
Eventually I did wake up and realised that I had not been out if bed at all during the night. 

Terror hit me at this stage thinking that I may have wet the bed when I thought I had gone to the toilet. But as luck would have it, all was well and I had not wet the bed.

But these things are so realistic,  that they can be remembered in great detail throughout the next day, and that is frightening. 

I was horrified when I hit my wife during one nights horrors, and she ended up with a black eye, which upset me, but it's not happened since. 

I think that she had tried to wake me up from the nightmare, and then became a part of it, so now she keeps well away and just talks to me

I understand that this sort of thing could be related to Parkinson's disease, but whether that's correct or not I don't know, but I hope to find out next month.




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