Tuesday, 11 November 2014

Abused people and dementia

Last week we we're at a conference, run by the Samaritans were we heard about children whose lives were damaged by abuse.

I wondered just how many people were abused as children or teenagers, and then struggled with this when they were diagnosed with dementia.

I suppose because like it or not abuse haunts you throughout life, but when you have dementia, it will be fixed in your memories, and will never go away.

Because it's the bad memories which stick in the mind, more than the good ones

I always think of my mother, who was abused by her step mother as a child.

Many of the people who were abused as children or teenagers, had no one to turn to, because like it or not, the abuser was either a family member, or someone close to the family.

No matter which way it was looked at, no one would have ever believed those who were abused,they would simply close ranks.

When I was diagnosed, I had a few sessions with a clinical psychologist discussing my nightmares and bad dreams, and we discussed things which could gave an impact on nightmares and bad dreams, and this subject did get discussed.

The psychologist did say that many people who were abused, struggled for the rest of their lives, but it was very rare for them to go on and abuse others, because they felt so bad about it. But this is something which always causes many concerns. However very few go on to abuse others,  as the press's say.

They memory is too hard to cope with, they would probably end up living in fear of ending their own lives first,

But we hear of people's life stories these days, which take in the memories of happy times, etc, but somewhere along the line any bad memories will have a drastic effect on our lives and dreams, and perhaps haunt those effected

As someone who has had many horrendous nights with nightmares, I feel very sorry for those who had bad things happen to them as children or teenagers.

I have no idea what causes my own nightly horrors, but if someone struggles with abuse as a child, and ends up with dementia, my heart goes out to them.

Then we get those in the later stages of the illness, who are abused by their carers or care home staff. They cannot fight back, and have no defence against the abusers

These days we are also getting all of the publicity on the media about the Jimmy Saville case, and this is hurting many people, even though the press, don't really care. Seeing this on prime time television each and every day must haunt many people with dementia or mental illness, even though they may well gave been the victims of abuse as children. 

Bless them all.








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